I'm a Shadow Artist?

First Paper-Cutting Session: Semi-Self-Portrait

As I reflect on my experiences, thoughts, and the work I have been creating physically and in my mind, the term "Shadow Artist" seems to capture it all so well. Circa 1999 I set aside much of my energy as an artist, and reallocated (yes, I just used that beloved buzz word) my time and passion into arts administration. Maggie Hanley (formerly the Manager Director) hired me at 171 Cedar Arts Center, where, me, an unfocused, twenty-year old, college stop-out/dropout discovered the art of writing queries and had a rejuvenating feeling of purpose. I finally felt like I was contributing. I felt successful, and within a few short months of working there I knew I would continue my studies, not as an artist, but as an arts administrator. 

It's interesting that at 33, the year I celebrate overcoming the illness I call "Artist Suppression Syndrome," I recall a conversation with Maggie at 171 in the kitchen (the old one in the Bruce House for those familiar with it). Perhaps Maggie was examining her life at the time and healing from some "Artist Suppression Syndrome" too. Anyway, we started talking about the book, "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron, particularly the key concept of being a Shadow Artist explored in the book. It's been a while since I read that book but I found a quote referenced from the book that describes this meaning well. 

Too intimidated to become artists themselves, very often too low in self-worth to even recognize that they have an artistic dream, these people become shadow artists instead. Artists themselves but ignorant of their true identity, shadow artists are to be found shadowing declared artists… Shadow artists often choose shadow careers — those close to the desired art, even parallel to it, but not the art itself.

So there we were, two classic shadow artists working at an arts center. Now, more than 10 years later, I am confronting that self-worth, that artistic dream, and trying to figure out where to start with it all.

I've been wondering if I should actually change the name of my blog from "Data Geek to Puppeteer" to something more fitting like "From the Desk of an Artsy Data Geek." I'm starting to think that my drive to "Go For It" isn't so much about being a puppeteer but about being an artist in general. I have a lot of ideas and concepts I am entertaining in my work, some incorporate puppetry and some fit my desire to just learn as much as I can about everything (sewing, felting, sculpture, painting, paper-cutting, dance...etc, etc). It's a little unsettling how all over the place I am with it. However, my friend Bridget (oh my, how blessed I am to have her in my life) encouraged me to look at it differently. She said, "if you were in art school, you would be learning and exploring many different mediums. Think of this year and/or the next few years as your art school years." Oh, that helps to think of it that way, whether you are pursuing your dreams as an artist or anything.

So here's what I've been up to:

• Shadow Puppetry and Paper-cutting: A few weeks ago I went to Fresh Ideas in Puppetry, a "puppetry conference" in Toronto put on by Puppetmongers: Toronto School of Puppetry. I was inspired by all the work I saw. On my drive back I realized that I want to focus my experimentation with puppetry on Shadow Puppetry. I'm really fascinated by paper-cutting/scherenschnitte, and this compliments my artistic development with shadow puppetry. It's also "cheap" and I can do it in my apartment versus in my attic studio (which is too hot right now) at my parent's house. Did I mention that my only actual puppet performance outside of undergrad was a Shadow Puppet show I did while working at the Armenian Library and Museum in Watertown, MA? Hence, "Shadow Artist" has multiple meanings right now. If you have no idea what Shadow Puppetry is, I'll be sure to share some cool finds. One my my recent favorites is this Pilobolus Dance Theatre "Shadowland" clip. You'll get chills it's so wonderful.  

 

• Domestic DIY: I've moved across town, yes again, so I've been working on that. However, in the process of brilliant cohabitation it's been fun to work on cool projects like building a spice rack. We researched and been creating a great spice rack in our small kitchen. It was inspired by this one: http://www.lifehacker.com.au/2009/11/mount-a-magnetic-spice-rack-to-keep-your-spices-accessible/



Recycled Bottle Caps







• Recycled Runway: I took a detour on it all to work on this community project directed by Amelia Harnas. It was fun creating recycled fashions for The ARTS of the Southern Finger Lakes benefit. What can I say, I like beer and making these outfits was a lot of fun! See my bottle cap dress and vest here...as well as many amazing, amazing pieces.Thanks for being my model, Barb, and thank you, Amelia, for creating another fun and safe space for experimentation!
• More Cupcakes, Please: I've found the winning cupcake recipe in Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World. They win on all levels so here's the recipe! They are a delightfully-delicious-post-sushi-dinner-dessert! Of course, mine aren't nearly as cute as the ones in the picture on PPK's website, but pink marzipan circle cut-outs are just as adorable and aesthetically pleasing. Don't get me wrong, all vegan cupcakes recipes from this book are great...but these take the "cupcake!"

Now that I'm settled, I'll probably be more likely to documenting my thoughts and practices. If you haven't yet, watch that Pilobolus video!

p.s. Thanks again to Maggie and Bridget and all who have inspired me more than you could possibly know!

A certain someone with rabbit ears.

My nephew...looks cross-eyed but it's an early attempt and I like the hair. I've learned it's really hard to create paper-cuttings of young people.